Firstly, COVID. Yes I’m still below par, but slowly improving. I had a “boom and bust” last week where I did my usual exercise classes and then had to spend the next day just lying around.
My current plan is a daily constitutional (my favourite grandad did that till he died at 96) and to really be guided by my body, trying not to push myself at all. It has made me reflect a lot on post viral syndrome and chronic fatigue syndrome and how poorly understood they both are. One of my hopes with COVID has been that it would be a positive outcome if a greater understanding and better management for those syndromes results from the large numbers of people experiencing Long COVID. I have been very open about my symptoms as I think there is a stigma around mentioning being below par (or is that just my issue? maybe).
Next issue: HOLIDAYS
I wanted to celebrate our first holiday in three years! I realise that rather than anticipatory excitement prior to a holiday I get from anticipatory anxiety. It was especially bad this time and I need to reframe it as excitement, a positive emotion so that in the weeks prior to going away I can look forward rather than absolutely dread going away.
I made the connection that the thought of going away is a trigger for me with being sent away to boarding school at a young age. I was desperate not to go, pleading with my grandad to let me live at his house instead. We had no going away type of holidays as a child so I have no positive links with holidays. Now I’ve made this connection at least I can recognise it as it reappears, reassure my 8 year old, Sukey that all will be well, and even if things go wrong, I will cope.
I actually like travelling by train (prefer it to car journeys) but can still get anxious about the actual travelling itself (as separate from the holiday) so I need to take good steps while doing that.
I find noise cancelling head phones with relaxing music and healthy snacks from home are a big help.
So just to sum up, once we were on the TGV train leaving Paris I started to really enjoy myself. Our first morning in our hotel I felt homesick but it quickly evaporated and I started to REALLY ENJOY myself. Even the COVID coming on after 5 days didn’t ruin the holiday at all, I LOVED the holiday.
I’m making this official so that when we get close to our next trip away it’s down here in black and white!
A lake in the beautiful Black Forest, Germany