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Vulnerability hangover

Updated: May 18, 2022

So I handed in (via the internet) my penultimate Assignment and instead of feeling relief and lightness, I plunged into a 2 day (and counting) blue funk. I think this is the whole vulnerability hangover that Brene Brown described in her TED talk. So many anxieties, what will I do without the structure of my longstanding coursework to give me boundaries, I’ve been head down, hard at work since December, do I have any friends left? Will my family disown me? What will people think of my work? Have I exposed myself to ridicule?.........

.......Well, a few days later I can safely say that the vulnerability has eased and I’m feeling a lot better. Basically, just getting through my day to day life, regardless of my mood does the trick, it lifts after a while. It is good to document it here as I have a tendency to move on and forget I ever struggled. Also, I still have lots of work to do, so I have to get back into it anyway!

So moving back to the topic of last week, here is the picture of my piano against the pink walls. For a long time I have thought of the piano as an ugly Victorian relic but I like it in it’s new place and am starting to love it more for itself as well as the sound it produces. I think I would say the room has been a qualified success. I had to work with the furniture we have and the ornaments and pictures loved by my husband. I personally like a minimalist, modern look so this room is a compromise, mixing old and new and it’s cosy and very welcoming in the evening. So I think it is a good lesson for my pride, nothing has to be perfect, good enough is FINE. (In the picture the walls above the pink bit looks yellow, in real life it is a neutral colour, just a trick of the light, and in the same way the fireplace looks blue when it is a very pale grey / white.

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